Our Last Supper

Last night Todd and I went out to dinner for the last time without having to arrange or plan ahead. Of course, this is also possibly the last time I won't be able to order anything on the menu that I want (i.e. wine, blue cheese, meat that isn't fully cooked, etc.)

I decided Simon's would work, since I wouldn't be as tempted there to have red meat. We had crab cakes and I had the simply grilled salmon. Todd ordered the salmon that I really wanted, with the blue cheese butter...but mine was just as good, I'm sure.

Before we left we took a final pregnancy picture. So here I am, all 39 weeks of me. Oh, and did I mention, I have less than 48 hours before this is all over? Actually, right now it's 45 hours and about 15 minutes....but who's really counting, right?



I then realized I stil had my glasses on and made Todd take another...

Things I didn't know

Since I only have 10 days left of being pregnant, it makes me think about the last (almost) 38 weeks and all the things I've learned. Here's a few...

1. Morning sickness really is a joke. It's not just the morning. It's ALL DAY LONG! Who knew morning sickness could strike in the middle of the night while you are sound asleep. Which leads to...
2. Zofran is a wonder drug! I would have never survived without it. Which also leads to...
3. All the people who said it would get better after the 1st trimester lied. I'm 10 days away from the end and I still throw up!
4. Virgin Pina Coladas are actually as good as the real thing. Although, it may have had something to do with the fact that they were served poolside in Mexico.
5. If the waiter in Mexico does by chance mix up the order, and serves you a real Pina Colada, you will IMMEDIATELY know. Don't worry.
6. I never thought that watching my husbands face light up during an ultrasound would actually be better than watching the actual ultrasound.
7. When it comes time to buy new (maternity) clothes, just do it. Having clothes that actually fit around you makes all the difference.
8. All the worrying I did about not feeling the baby move yet, was quickly replaced by total worry over whether I was feeling him move enough, which has now been replaced by wishing he would hold still once in a while because it hurts when he moves in certain ways.
9. People that say "get your sleep now while you can" have either never been pregnant or have forgotten how impossible it is to sleep at the end. You cannot get into a comfortable position that still allows for breathing...and if you do, you'll just have to pee in the next 2 seconds.
10. Worrying (endlessly) about having the baby come early has now been replaced with wanting him to come NOW!

And finally, having a husband who, for the most part, rolls with things and is able to calm my fears has helped get me through this whole thing. From the shots to the sickness to the bedrest/light duty to the moodiness...everything! (thanks, Todd)

Photo Requests

I've been asked by quite a few people why I haven't posted a pregnant picture of myself. I did put one on myspace a while ago, but I guess I haven't really thought about it. I'll try to get one in the next 11 days and put it on here for you all to see.

Also, I saw the doc on Wednesday. No bribes were taken. She did say we could move the date up a week, but I would have to have an amnio to check lung maturity. That is not happening. I did find out that I've been discussed in their weekly care conference for my whole pregnancy (being "high-risk" and then on top of that being the only pregnant MS patient in the practice makes me interesting apparently), and that everyone is aware of my plans and wishes and everyone is "on-board" so to speak. Hopefully this won't really matter, but just on that off chance he decides to come before my scheduled day, it made me feel better knowing everyone was in agreement incase my doc isn't on-call.

2 weeks

I have officially reached "full term". I'm 37 weeks now, so technically the little man could make his appearance any day and it would be fine. If he sticks with the plan, he'll be here in exactly 2 weeks (the 25th).

I have also officially reached the uncomfortable stage. I thought I had run out of room months ago, but now I know I have! Sleeping is next to impossible, which I guess I should just get used to, right? I go to the doctor tomorrow for my weekly check and I have seriously considered bribing her to move my date up a week.

What else...I had another OB triage visit. I'm really starting to hate that place. I passed another kidney stone, although this one was really not fun. Two stones in a week is a little excessive, I think. I had another shower, this one given by the lab. I cannot believe how much stuff we have been given. This baby has SO many clothes I don't think I'll have to do laundry for a month after he's born! Of course, that also means he'll probably out-grow everything after he wears it once.

Everything is pretty much ready. I don't have my hospital bag packed yet, but the cord blood kit and camera are by the door just in case. All we need now is the baby!

Update

Sorry to leave everyone hanging, but the last couple of days have been a little crazy. Monday I saw my doctor, who THANK GOD didn't put me back on bed-rest. She basically said that as long as I feel OK at work, and that working doesn't make things worse, I can keep going. It helps that I'm still only working 6 hours a day, and that most of that time is spent sitting. She also said that the baby is just getting ready to come, even if it is a little early. I'm now at 35 weeks, so it really wouldn't be awful if he was born now, possibly a little NICU time, but nothing major.

I complained a little about some bladder pain/problems, but with Mason's head literally on my bladder, she didn't seem to worried. Well, as the afternoon went on the pain got worse and I ended up going back in to give a urine sample. Sorry for anyone who doesn't work in healthcare and isn't used to talking about pee, just skip this part if you want. Anyway, the nurse comes out and without really looking at me asks me if I'm on my period. HELLO?! Did you not notice the basketball under my shirt? Apparently there was a lot of blood in my urine. So they think I have a pyelonephritis (kidney infection) and write me a script for antibiotics. They also wanted me to try to pee again since there wasn't much the first time, so I did, and voila! out comes a big old kidney stone. (seriously, it was big...over 6mm...I measured it myself) Helps explain all the back pain I had been having!

Well, this all could be an explanation for the preterm labor. And the contractions have gotten better. So maybe Mason will hang out until the 25th after all.

Well THAT wasn't supposed to happen

Last weekend we had baby shower #1, which was the AFD "baby party" (they call it this because it's a couples event, and men don't/won't go to a shower). It went well, even though I was nervous about it. Most of my nerves were just because Todd hasn't been with this crew very long and I don't know most of the wives yet. It also doesn't help that Todd has been traveling as a captain so much he hasn't been with his actual crew lately. Anyhow...it was great to meet wives I hadn't before and just have a nice party with no games. The crew was also very generous and we may be getting that Chariot at REI after all with the help of their gift card.

Yesterday was baby shower #2. This one was thrown by my aunt and mom. It was the usual type of women-only baby shower that I usually don't like going to. I made them swear there would be no games at this shower either, although my mom did sneak one game in. Not too bad, just the basket full of stuff that you look at and then try to remember everything that was in it. Simple and I get to keep the basket and everything in it. I ended up being so incredibly spoiled by everyone, and I now have a long list of thank you cards to write.

During shower #2 I started having some cramping, which I figured was just because I had been doing more than I usually do, or should be doing. After I got home the cramping just kept getting worse, so I called Todd at work to ask the hypothetical "if I need you to come home" question. Turned out to be not so hypothetical after all and he came off shift and took me to OB Triage. Long story short.........pre-term labor. Because of my abruption a few months ago they were concerned that trying to stop the contractions would make the abruption/bleeding worse. So for a while there was talk of taking him via c-section last night (minor freak out/crying moment when this conversation happened). I was sent to ultrasound, which showed my placenta was OK, so the decision was then made to try to stop the contractions. Quick shot of terbutaline and more monitoring..............and at 2ish in the morning we were finally sent home.

The contractions didn't completely stop, but they have definitely slowed down and are less intense. I'm taking is easy today, and I have to call my doctor in the morning. The doc on call last night was a little more lenient than I'm afraid mine will be....keep your fingers crossed she doesn't put me on bedrest again! So for now baby is good and is staying put until 11/25. I'll update more when I know more.

A few simple facts

I haven't had to rant in a while about MS, so maybe it's just that I'm overdue, but it seems that lately ignorance is rearing its ugly head again. I admit, before my diagnosis, I was fairly ignorant about MS as well. I honestly don't mind talking about it, answering questions, none of this bothers me. What does bother me is people who think they are the expert. Anyway, here are a few facts. And if you don't want to take my word for it, the National MS Society has a great website with tons of information.

* Multiple Sclerosis is NOT the same as Muscular Dystrophy
* It is estimated that 400,000 people in the U.S. have MS, although these numbers are thought to be much higher since it's not a reportable disease to the CDC
* I did NOT get MS because I drink Diet Coke! Or because of any other reason other than I have bad luck. It's an autoimmune disease, my body attacks its own myelin.
* It is OK to be pregnant if you have MS! Actually, because of the immune response and extra hormones produced in pregnancy, MS usually goes into a remission period.
* With the above being true, yes, the post partum period can be difficult. That being said, for me, I'm prepared for it and have already decided on my course of action. (For those of you who are curious, I'll be doing monthly IVIg infusions for a while so I can still breastfeed)
* MS does not mean I'm dying. Nor does it mean that I'm going to be in a wheelchair.
* No, I'm not passing it on to the baby. Seriously, if this were true do you honestly think I would have gotten pregnant? The decision to have a baby was not an easy one, and I still worry about all the what-ifs associated with MS and what they would mean for my child.
* My MS has been fine since I've been pregnant. Since my diagnosis I've been lucky to have only had mild symptoms, and since I became pregnant, the symptoms have all been gone.

I know there's more. I get asked some pretty heinous things sometimes, but this is all I can think of now. Maybe I should start a weekly post for MS Rumors/Updates.

One last thing, I received a "Save the Date" reminder for the 2009 Walk MS. This year the Anchorage walk will be April 18th. I will be putting together a team again, so be expecting an email with more info soon.

The Final Countdown

I scheduled the c-section today. November 25th is the big day. I'll be in the hospital for Thanksgiving, but I'll have so much to be thankful for this year I don't think I'll mind. Besides, I'm sure I can convince my family to have Thanksgiving a couple days late this year.

For those who aren't caught up on everything, after Todd and I went to childbirth classes like a good little pregnant couple, my doctor had a long talk with us at my last OB appt. We talked about my higher risk of bleeding and about multiple sclerosis issues and all kinds of things. In the end it was really up to me, but once the 'hemorrhage' word was spoken, it was pretty much decided for me. I just can't take that risk, and I certainly don't need the extra worry. Not that a c-section is 100% safe, but it's less risky for me personally. And of course, I've already called L&D to check the anesthesiologist schedule, just to be sure!

So, that's that. Just 34 days away! Kind of crazy, really. I already re-set my countdown so it will be accurate. I have to admit, not only is having an "end date" in sight helpful, having a scheduled day is SO helpful to me and my type-A self. It's almost relaxing in a way...well, as relaxing as the idea of surgery can be.

When is it my turn?

One of the other pregnant girls at work is probably having her baby as I type this. Her water broke today at work. Well, not broke in the gushing water sense that people see in movies, but none the less, she was, well, leaking. She had been having pains/contractions since yesterday, but today after the leaking she was told by everyone at work to go to the hospital. (Side note: DUH!!! was my response. While not the most sensitive, it seemed crazy that she wouldn't know to do that)

Another one of the the pregnant girls at work is also probably delivering right now. Last I heard she was heading to L&D to be started on Pitocin. (Another note: Yes, work is full of pregnant people right now. I'm one of 3 in the lab and one of 5 or 6 in x-ray)

Basically, I'm just a little jealous. It reminds me of before we finally got pregnant, when I was constantly complaining to Todd that everyone else was having babies except for us! I know my time will be here soon enough, and honestly, if my water broke today I'd be more than a little freaked out, but I'm ready. I'm ready for the heartburn to go away, to sleep comfortably again, to work my normal job/hours again, to eat blue cheese and drink a glass of wine, and most of all I'm just ready to meet this little one I've been hosting for the last 8 months. I want to see what he looks like, and find out if it's really true that heartburn=hair. I feel like I already know him and his little personality. Now I just need to meet him face to face.

What's in a name?

A lot of people have asked how or why we picked the names we have for the new baby. Let me start by saying that is one difficult task! It was a little easier that we're having a boy. I kept saying early on in my pregnancy "he" whenever I talked about the baby (this was when I wasn't referring to him as "the Parasite"), so when we found out for sure it was a boy, there were already names being considered. And we seemed to agree faster on boy names than girl ones.

The middle name was easy. Todd's mom, who passed away in '06, was named Patricia, and so is my grandmother. Patrick was the easy way to honor both of these important women in our lives, and we both like the name. Patrick, for anyone into the meaning of names, means noble.

The first name was a little more difficult. I was so sick for the first 5 months that I joked often we were going to have to name the child Koehler after the toilet that he seemed so attracted to! We both love the name Mason. But I also love the name Gordon. Now before everyone starts snickering at Gordon, it would have also honored people in our families. Todd's dad, who also passed away in '06 had Gordon as his middle name, and my grandfather is also a Gordon. Todd couldn't get on-board with Gordon, fearing a lifetime of teasing and being called "Gord-o" was ahead for the little guy. So Mason, meaning (duh) stoneworker, it is.

Mason Patrick Loy. Not bad, if I do say so myself.

Kleenex filled birthday

No, I'm not crying about my upcoming birthday, I'm sick. It's been a long time since I've had a cold, I don't really remember when the last time was actually. But, sure enough, everyone in the little space I'm confined to at work has been passing in around, and while I avoided it longer than most...it found me. And just in time for the big 2-9 on Wednesday.

The worst part is being pregnant and having a cold. You can't take anything for it! Oh, except regular Sudafed, and cough drops. Oh, Tylenol...so basically, as I was saying, you can't take anything for it. And since I already feel like I can't catch my breath 90% of the time, being all plugged up fills in that 10% that I had a glimmer of breathing normally.

Other than having a cold, things have been fairly boring around here. Todd's birthday was Tuesday, and of course he was at work. Thursday night Todd made dinner for me while I watched Sarah Palin stumble through her debate with Joe Biden. Last night we went to my parents house for a little joint birthday gathering. I know sometimes Todd thinks it's a little weird, but that's just because our families are so polar opposite on things like this. So, while he thinks it's weird that my family gets together and celebrates birthdays and such, I think it's weird that his doesn't even call each other half the time (no offense to any of the Loy/Moran family intended).

We also went to another childbirth class Friday. I was considering becoming a childbirth class drop out for most of the day before the class, and of course, Todd would have totally supported this, but we went anyway. It wasn't as bad as the first class. I left feeling a little more confident in my own ability to labor and give birth, although I'm still not 100% convinced that a c-section isn't the way to go.

Well, that's all for now. It's time to open another box of Kleenex.

I'm not doing THAT!

Todd and I had our first childbirth class last night, and the title of this blog basically is how I feel about the entire labor process. Now, I'm not one of those women who just realized this during childbirth class, I've been in health care long enough and seen enough laboring moms in my life that I've known this since I was 17 years old and saw my first live birth. I know he has to come out, and I'm excited for that to happen, I'm just not so excited for HOW they are proposing he come out.

I am a big fan of having a c-section. Todd and I do not see eye to eye on this one. I am not a hippie, natural childbirth kind of girl. I have nothing to prove about my woman-li-ness, and, well, I can't get past the fact that I will be pooping in front of people! (quick note here: for all you women who have given birth and think that you did not in fact poop in front of people, you're wrong. the docs and nurses who work in L&D are just used to it and usually push it aside before you ever notice, just ask anyone who works there) Up until a couple of weeks ago, I wasn't going to have much choice in the matter. My placenta was really low for the first 7 months of my pregnancy, but, alas, that is the one thing that has gone right and it has since moved up and out of the way.

So, I'm going to birthing classes and being a good sport. I'm trying to have an open mind about everything, even though what I'm really thinking is that I'M NOT DOING THAT!!!

Sneak Peek

This picture is from my latest, and hopefully last, ultrasound that was done 9/11. Every ultrasound I've had the tech has tried to get a clear shot of his face but he refuses to move his hands out of the way. So this is the best we've gotten. He does appear to have a fully formed lip/palate, which was a huge relief to Todd.

It's strange enough to think about having a little person growing inside of me, but even stranger when you see him on the big screen.

New blog for a new family

Finally got around to setting up a blog to share our stories and adventures with family and friends. I meant to start blogging about my pregnancy around week 12 or so, but here I am starting week 31 and this is my first post. Better late than never, right?

A quick update of the last 31 weeks. We found out we were pregnant in March, and from the beginning this has proven to be quite the journey. I lived on Zofran for the first 20 weeks or so, and Todd had to give me shots of Progesterone until around that time as well. We found out that we're having a boy, which, although I would have been happy with a boy or a girl, deep down I really wanted a boy. Most recently I've been on light-duty due to a small abruption that happened around week 22. I'm grateful that work has been so accommodating with me so I didn't end up on bed rest for 4 months. As difficult as the pregnancy has been on me, baby appears to be healthy as can be, which is all that really matters after all.

Things are looking up, and the end is clearly in sight! Little Mason Patrick will hopefully be making his first appearance around Thanksgiving, giving us much to be thankful for this year.